The First Anniversary

Well, I was long absent from this blog. I was a bit busy – I had enough time and thing to write here, but I was short of time and idea to draw pictures! I wanted to give a picture when I wrote here, so I was waiting for an idea…

But today’s the first anniversary for my baptism. How can I wait for writing my gratefulness to God and people?

As a matter of fact, I have recently drawn one picture. But this time I had a difficulty to explain about it.
Today, I show it here.

It’s the picture of lamenting people in the Bible, wearing rough clothes, sitting on the dusts and throwing them on their heads.

You might find strange that I show a tragic picture on my celebrating day. But I think lamenting is the way that the Lord gave us, when we are fallen in human conflicts.

When you are insulted by someone, can you really love him or pray for him from the true heart? Can you theologically reason yourself, why other people in the world lose their lives and suffer, whereas we do not? Isn’t there some time that you can’t stand your own failure or defects?

At such time, we can lament in front of God. I might have spent the first year only with the beginner’s enthusiasm. Next year my belief might meet with more conflict, inducement or other obstructions. Then I will just lament instead of getting angry or pretend to be reasonable.

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Together

Soon comes the first anniversary of my baptism, on 25th November.
Earlier I often had tears when I prayed and sang to God, moved by emotion, which was unable to explain.
Nowadays I have been much settled mentally and seldom find tears in the church.
But it was what happened the other day: we were singing a modern praise song. As a matter of fact, I don’t like modern songs as much as traditional hymns. But when I came to the lyric:

I thank the Lord Jesus, who stayed and cried together with me, when I was in sorrow.

Tears came up to my eyes and I could not stop them.
Therefore, I started to draw the image, that the Lord Jesus is together with a crying person.

This is the person.

Then how I draw Jesus?

I didn’t imagine Him sitting together with the man.
If I am this man…my mind will be occupied with my own sorrow and anxiety, and could not find Him close to me.
And I imagine, Jesus would not force me to look at Him. He would just stay there but never leave there.

While thinking as above, I began to imagine the figure, or even the shadow of the Lord, not with a solid shape of a man, but soft, thin, fluidic like ether, floating around the crying man.

That is our Lord.

Then the color? man is grey, in the midst of two strong impression, white and black.
I often paint the figure for Jesus black, to give Him the strongest impression. But in this figure, I dont’t need that.
I thought about what color to use for Him, and gave up. OK, I may will paint Him as pretty as I like.
I used the three colors, typical of Japanese traditional sweets.